Bathurst 2003 : Team Gerry Hattrick

[Graeme]

Rumour has it that Brocky will use his fame and new fortune to mount a more calculated attack on Bathurst next year.

Utilising his mega merchandising funds, much of which is directly related to sales of diecast model cars, it has been loosely reported that Brock will lease two Commodores from HRT for the 2003 Great Race.

In concert with his old partner Jim Richards (with Allan Moffat nominated as reserve driver), they will race one car in the new Team Gerry Hattrick colours. The other car will be run for Team Brock with driver pairings yet to be confirmed.

Can anyone shed further light on this story ??

[ferrari fan]

A lot of racefans will look forward to next year and ticketsales are already up on this year's record attendance
I think that Leo Gregorean is also pencilled in for a drive.
Anybody over 45 will be able to claim a Pensioners discount by just mentioning the name Peter Brock
Look at the result and you'll see that a lot of Mature teamdrivers were there at the pointy end when it counts
Life must start at 40 as they say and no team snotnose is as yet entered:)

[ausdiver]

i also heard that they are going to install an escalator to allow the Gerry Hattrick team access to the dais :p

[ferrari fan]

The escalator will be there but the use is solely for the winning XU1 or Mustang or XB/C to be slowly lifted up to just underneath the podium as in the USAGP of this year
If one can conquer the Bathurst mountain one surely does not need an aide to get to the saucy scanly clad chicks . To Be Sure To Be Sure! :D

[timbo333]

You guys just crack me up with this great dry humour.........

Gerry Hattrick......(geriatric) very, very good!!

And Ferrari Fan....I can't wait to see the scanly clad babes......I have visions of girls wearing Scania trucks!!!..........Scanly for scantily.....absolutely brilliant!!

Oh it hurts if I laugh too much!!!

Ferrari Fan.........don't dare change the way you write on these forums......you make my day sometimes.....I'm laughing with you NOT at you.

Cheers,

:D

[loste_treasures]

maybe they can use the trophy to store their false teeth next to their beds at night????

[KRAKA05]

I also understand that there will be mandatory 5 min pitstops for all drivers ....... only access will be to the PORTA-LOO.

KRAKA05

[ferrari fan]

all of this is good as long as we can also get back to the olden way's of getting counsiled when one breaks down prematuraly
straight into the teamtransporter and giving the suspension of the truck a good work out with one of the scania girls:D
on the subject of teethbaths ,this could be a problem as there is so much silverware standing around that one would easily lose one's snappers and to pay for a replacement set one would drive like a maniac to get the pricemoney and one can see that this will be an never ending circle
so team pram express never gets to the dias with the chicks HeHe
and will be for ever a virgin unless a breakdown would occur before team G.H. heven forbid:D

[wombat]

In addition to the dias escalators (two-way of course) there will porta-loos placed strategically around the Mountain for those little emergencies.

The TV ads wills subtely change to incorporate the new hi-speed viagra tablets, Just spectacles and laxative pills.

Cars will be fitted with oxygen and do-doze tablets.

Enough, enough.

[ferrari fan]

Instead of a polarizer we will have the mandatory Akubra (hat) :eek: ($pon$or$hip ) and another entry confirmed A. Crice)
and an automatic headnodding dog stature in the back with a flameproof duva blanket strateticly draped in the back to hide the illegal drinkbottle made out of aluminium and under preasure with a frothdispenser commonly called a keg to slow team G.H down
also we will hard wire the indicator permanently on
let's have some more idea's on this subject

[ausdiver]

dont forget all the tourist lookouts where travel happy snaps can be taken, as well as a place to break out the THERMOS :D

[drof]

Heres a picture of Team Brock's Driver line up for next year and the car they will drive!!

Regards

Dave from Kiwiland!!

[Graeme]

Drof, that is a top shot !!

I remember HDT's slogan : Body by Holden, Soul by Brock.

Maybe this is body by Brock, powered by Skaife. And, maybe we could see Skaife next year pushing Brock around for 161 laps - the marshalls will be waving blue flags everywhere.

[ausdiver]

at least theyll finish the 161 laps, lets see if any fords can :D

[ferrari fan]

This has been said many times before ;
Any of these racecars are as far away from a normal roadcar as we are from the sun
they all run FORD 9 inch diffs in them and what about the brakes ,gearbox,computer oilpumps etc,etc
only the skin and aerodynamics are different plus the frontsuspension and the stickers
these cars are no holdens or fords!genericly (spelcheck please!)

[ausdiver]

thank you ferrari fan, i apologize profusley for offending u and having a jibe at the "enemy", i will refain from having any fun in a discussion in the future

[ferrari fan]

You've won anyway as all the donks are chevs (not chefs) now there would be a race with a carefully prepared V8 donky on a spit that will take aprox 8 hours and countless laps around to cook to perfection and then the finnish party!! where is that supricechef bloke from Helenica that boils a bonzachowfest whatever the make of your beercooler is?:D

Sorry mate I took it to serious and thought for a momebt that you were having a concerted go at the brand that comes First On Race Day :D

[Graeme]

There's a new rumour going round.

So as to give Team Gerry Hat-trick and all the non-TWR teams an even chance, AVESCO has decided to drop the new BA and VY sedans for next year.

AVESCO's head honcho Tony Cockdrizzle has accepted a huge backhander to establish the Magna and Camry as the new force in Australian Touring car racing. Each model of car will be putting out in excess of 850bhp through six inch wide front wheels.

Both Bridgestone and Dunlop are working furiously to develop tyres that will last more than five laps of an average race circuit.
Rolling starts may be necessary to prevent excess wheelspin and the likely choking of nearby spectators.

This format suits the television networks which are lobbying for four race heats at each round, each heat to be of five to ten laps duration. It is hoped that this idea will help eliminate Safety Car periods and allow for increased time for well paid television commercial advertisements, much as was witnessed during the latest Bathurst telecast.

[ausdiver]

how about this for a headline then ferrari fan

2003 Bathurst Winner is........ Team Generic

Driving the new FALDORE, manufactured by HOLDORD a whole new class of racing, V8 STEREOTYPES, motor racing fans said to be MEDIOCRE about the new AVERAGE class of racing

[ferrari fan]

"Team TWR" This is going to the history books as there are lines of creditors waiting to put their claim in the courts . So tom will have to learn to live in a lesser hut and drive a very secondhand, may I sugest Ford or trabant
The ownership of the shares is going to change as this individual seems to have dug a tremendously deep hole