Skaife joke.

[rowdydave]

A plane was about to crash with 5 people on board and only 4 parachutes.

The first person said, "I am John Howard, the Australian Prime Minister who can really help my country and I think I should be saved." The others said, "OK." and gave him a parachute.

The second person said, "I am Steve Waugh, captain of the all conquering Australian cricket team, which at one stage won 16 tests in succession. I think I should be saved to continue the captaincy." The others agreed and gave him a parachute.

The third person said, "I am Mark Skaife, I am a four time winner of the Bathurst 1000 motor race and I am the number one driver for the Holden Racing Team. Everyone knows I am a nice guy, but people think I am arrogant, but I'm not, so I am taking a parachute." and off he went.

There were two people left, the pope and a ten year old schoolgirl. The Pope said, "Child, I am old and frail and have lived my life. You are young and have you're whole life to live. You take the parachute and I will stay with the plane and take my chances."

"It's o.k." said the girl, "there are still two parachutes left. Mark Skaife picked up my schoolbag."

:D

[Graeme]

Like it !!!

Knowing Skaifey's luck, his nose would hit the ground first and thus brake his fall.

[ferrari fan]

One guess who the pilot is of this plane; Jeff Greigh

[bernoo]

What is the difference between Skaife and Brocky.
Everyone likes Brock.

[brchi17]

I had to laugh the other day when I read one journalist who had writtern that Skaife was the 'new' king of the mountain and the greatest driver of all time, as he had won more championships that Brock & more Bathursts than moffat. I nearly laughed my self silly.
Now no one can deniy that he is good, but that good ????
I don't think so.
I though it was funny that even though he had won on Sunday, there were a lot of people booing him - almost seems appropiate!!!

[ET351]

Skaife better than Brock and Moffat????

Now that IS a joke.

Now seriously, who thinks he would have won without pace car intervention?

Brock and Moffat would have eaten him alive in their heyday. Now they were the good old days... no pace car, just slow down when you go past the flatbed recovery truck!!


Cheers ET351

[Esses]

I love it Rowdy. A mate at work is a mad Holden nut but doesn't like Skaife, I'll have to tell it to him. Don't forget that many poeple hated Moffat, but gradually warmed to him, even if 2 of his Bathurst wins were because of Team Orders. Maybe Skaifey'll mature one day.

[Dale Robertson]

I heard this the other day ......

What have you got if you have Skaife buried up to his neck in
sand????? Not enough sand heheehehe

[Aussiecollector]

You can not compare drivers of different generations. Too many things are different, cars, tracks, people. It is better to compare each driver in there given era.

Brock is the most prominent driver currently to cross over into the next gen of cars and were did he finish.

Comparisions of 80's drivers and cars against todays drivers and cars is a nothing comparison because you can not compare it is not possible.

You do have to give Skaife his due's he is the best with the resources and rules available to him in 2002. Brock was also in the race with the same resources and rules, where did he finish again?
Don't get me wrong I not bagging Brock, that would be stupid because he has the wins to prove that he was the Master of Bathurst, but its just that WAS the Master. In his day with the team and resources he was what Mark Skaife is today a deserved winner.

Glenn

[V8SS]

Is this a case of Tall Poppy syndrome rearing its ugly head again.
Mark Skaife has won the last 3 ATCC's and Bathurst for two years running. OK, HRT may have the resources and the budget but surely Skaifes success is too much of a fluke to be lucky. I think he deserves the plaudits. He may not be as spectacular as some drivers but he does all the right things, makes minimal mistakes and keeps the car on the road and out of trouble. If thats whats won him races then he must be the best at it. I'm sure in time, people will look back and acknowledge what a good driver Skaife was. I read in an earlier post that Alan Moffat wasn't all that popular at one time. Time will tell but the records will show that Skaife is a 5 time ATCC and 4 time Bathurst winner. You can't take that away from him.

[KRAKA05]

V8SS

I totally agree, you cannot compare drivers from differrent times.

Skaife has shown over the last few years that he is worthy of the 4 bathursts and 5 ATCC crowns.

I actually think he has become a better driver since his big crash at Eastern Creek.

Kraka05

[wombat]

You have all made fair points about Skaife's driving ability (if not critisisms about his character and personality)

However, to laud the guy to some of the levels that I have read is a little bit over the top.

A critical factor in Skaife's success has been the No1 HRT car. I reckon any one of a dozen or more drivers might have won recent ATCC's and Bathurst with that car and that team. The fact that Skaife has means that he has his bum in the right place at the right time.

The same might be said of other drivers in the past, although I am hesitant to nominate any in particular.

I wonder if the only true test would be to prepare a dozen identical cars, draw lots at the start of a race for cars and teams, then let em rip.

[oldxr]

How good is he, just ask him, FIGJAM, but don't forget the SEGA sponsored car he drove before joining hrt, where did that end up at Bathurst and the championship.
He may have won the championship 4 times but very few fulltime suporters like him. wouldn't consider him a true champion. not in the same league as Brock, Moffat or Johnson.
skaife, good driver (not great).

[Grubby]

Mark Skaife is a good driver and in years to come will be know as a great of the sport.

Those lean years after the Nissan & before coming to HRT have made him a better driver. He has been at both ends of the field and now understands what it is and how to win & be successful.

Ok he does not have the personality of a Brock or Lowndes but give him a break. Skaife can drive & is one of the best.

All top sportspeople are called arogant at some stage.
They are just confident and believe in themselves & their ability. Not arogance just self belief.


Grubby

[Senator1]

i don't think anyone is knocking Skaife's ability to drive, what people don't like about him is his attitude, at Bathurst & other races i've attended over the years, the crowd "boo" him for example in the VB challenges when introduced, yet the crowds cheer when Bright does the challenge.

[oldxr]

You got that exactly right senator1, most people i know, holden and ford suporters alike hope anyone but skaife wins.

[loste_treasures]

i feel like telling a Skaife experience.

I was at Sandown about 1 year ago. In between races me, my 4 year old son (at the time) and my brother went up to the pits in the hope of getting some autographs.

My son who was just starting out in the race scene had been told all about HRT and was looking forward to getting a glimpse of his new heros.

All sounds normal you say?

Well as some of you already know the crowds around the HRT camp are huge at the best of times and getting a good look at the team is often difficult.

My son was on top of my shoulders straining to look around. My brother looked at my son (Samuel) and mentioned to me that he looked sad. I took him off my shoulders and asked him why he was so sad and that he should be happy that he was finally looking at the HRT team. "Daddy i cant see Kaife" his response was. For some reason at that time he couldnt say Skaife properly.

I replied to him that he must be eating his lunch or doing something else. My son wasnt happy with that and was even more upset. He replied "Maybe we can have lunch with him?". I said "Well if we see him maybe you could ask him" knowing that the chances of that were very slim.

Guess what happened next?

Out of a tent came the man himself. The crowds flocked around him to get the usual photos, signatures etc. My sons face lit up. I couldnt stop him. Off he went in the direction of Skaife without me of course. Actually for a while i had lost both my brother and my son.

As i moved up to the area where the crowd was, Skaife had finished with the crowd and was walking towards the HRT garage when he was pulled by the trouser leg!!! My son had somehow managed to crab the man himself!!

My brother saw this and mentioned to me that Samuel had Skaife and was talking to him. He had been talking to him for around 30 seconds. I saw this and quickly apologised for my sons actions. I couldnt believe it. You know what Skaife told me?

Nah, dont worry about it. He said to Samuel "Never mind Samuel, we might have lunch next time. But how about your dad take a picture of me and you?"

Aparently Samuel had asked Mark what he wanted to eat and that his dad (me) would get it for us!! Mark was abit surprised by this question and was left speechless.

Well say no more!! Samuel couldnt control himself, and i couldnt say no.

I took a couple of pictures with Mark and Samuel together infront of the HRT garage. You should see Samuels face. He looks so proud that he is with his hero, Mark Skaife.

The pictures now sit in his room, on the fridge and on my desk at home. Samuel is quick to point out to anyone he sees that his best friend is Mark Skaife and he has the picture to prove it.

How can anyone argue with a 4 year old? And lets see you try telling him that Skaife is not a good driver???

A true story.......

[Esses]

That has to be the best post I've seen in a long time. My oldest boy is 4 & that's just the sort of thing he'd do. I don't know & have never met Skaife, I'm just sick of that red thing winning 99% of the races.

[Aussiecollector]

Loste Great story, Most of the other guys with a massive chip on their shoulders can see the point.

How many times do you have to see it written, the crap about the sega car is just stupid, of couse he was not going to win in an under funded team with little resources. The driver is just one component of the car and team without all the rest of the components you don't win races. Skaife and bright and Murphy have the resources most would have to agree that allof the other components other than the drivers are equal, but who wins the races, SKAIFE the guy is good just as Craig was when he had the other components around him, now he does not and the strength of the driver alone can not win races. Put Craig back at HRT and he would win just as ambrose would and many others. But at the moment they are just a strong component in weaker teams. So all you CHIP Carrying Ford loving whingers get off the Skaife bagging because its very boring.

Glenn

[SWRT]

Even though I'm a mad subaru supporter,the Subaru World Rally team who is owned by Prodrive is technically linked with FPV and expect a current Ford team to be called FPV racing(hopefully 00 motorsport).
Ford has stronger links with Subaru then Holden do,General motors own 20% of Subaru but Ford Aus now have a motorsport link so I guess I'll go for anyone but Skaife for the rest of the year and beyond.
Also I noticed that last sunday no one else but Skaife acctually pulled up beside another car during a restart and I guess old Jimmy Richo wouldn't have done that either,that's tipical of HRT-always making the rules work for them........be interesting what penalties other drivers would for pulling up beside another car during a race restart-a drive through or a 1 minute penalty served in pitlane.

Boo the EVIL #1
SWRT
Rally Oz results
1-Makinen
2-Solberg
3-Arai or Bourne

[Martin Thomas]

Skaife cant be that stupid (schoolbag joke), He stayed with HRT.

It wasnt that long ago a couple of Ford mates hated lownds, or clownds as they called him. I asked why, they said he was an arrogant smartass. I asked how they long they had known him, they hadnt.
Of course hes a great guy now....

Im not a TWR supporter but you cant argue with results. Murph was in a great position, a mistake in the pits and a stupid penalty cost him any chance. The Castrol cars were strong and could maybe have pulled off a win if not for the pace car, but skaife kept the car on the lead lap, out of trouble, and blew away Richards on the re-start, same as bright. (who had sufferred a penalty that prevented a HRT 1-2. I think Larry and Stephen arent upset about Skaife and Bright using the rules to thier full advantage, but ought to be upset by not being prepared for the tactic... (Im a castrol supporter by the way)

Skaife is undoubtibly in the strongest team, But I bet if you swapped him and Ambrose over The HRT team would get sick of hearing the phrase "sorry guys" over the radio. I wonder how much Skaifs experience would help SBR dial the car up a bit better.

Maybe Skaife is a tosser, I dont know. But I dont trust people in a beer fuelled crowd to influence my judgement. If I used that I would Rekon Lleyton Hewitt was a hero and Eddie Mcguire a legend.

I too am sick of seeing skaife win but I dont hate him for it. Just like I dont hate the Brisbane Lions but wish Hawthorn could lift thier game.

Who was ambrose teamed with at Bathurst, maybe SBR should get some expierenced guys with the youngsters in the enduros. I wonder how much Skaife has learnt from richards over the years..

[SWRT]

When I heard Paul Weel would be with Ambrose I knew it was a bad decision because he's just not up to Ambroses pace,that's why they lost the QLD 500 and what caused thier tyre blow outs at Bathurst was too much front camber......damn you Brisbane lions.

[skaifehsv]

:p I must say that reading everyones comments on Skaife's driving abilities I must say well the man must have someone looking down on him. He is the man of the moment and no matter what people say he is the best for now. Maybe in couple of years time when he retires and the next best man steps up to the line we might all say the same thing about them.

We love you Skaifey regardles of what others think:D

[BATHURSTFAN]

The only reason I haven't admired Skaife is because of the images of him charging down the pits and going off at other drivers and teams because of racing incidents. Those images have stuck with me, in particular the one where he was going off at at Alan Jones (F1 World Champ.)some years ago.

To me it just smacked of arrogance with the frequency that he was doing it. He's not so bad now as everything is going ok for him but first impressions have left a mark.

Maybe one day when HRT think he has passed his used by date he may end up in a Ford.
:D

As for HRT/TWR, well its just frustrating to see the same cars out front all the time and being a team with 5 cars, massive budget and the technology being passed down from TWR, but if it were a Ford team winning all the time the Holdens supporters will be complaining - it's just a viscious circle.

As for Lowndes I didn't support him when he drove for Holden and thats the only reason, but now I do because he's with Ford, plus you have to admire the bloke for jumping ship from HRT and taking the risk with another team for whatever reasons. Plus he has personality, which goes a long way in any sport - just look at Brock.

[Esses]

This one's going on & on. I don't hate anyone, not even Skaife. As a Brockiphile I'm nominally a Holden supporter, but I've gradually leant the other way as HRT win race after race. When one team wins virtually every race in a season there's something not right. They obviously have a clear advantage & that does not promote close racing, it promotes desperation. As Russell Ingall once said;" The other Teams are falling over each other because we're all racing at 110% to keep up with Bug-a-Lugs here (Skaife)." Even when Brocky was at his peak he had intense competition from the likes of Moffat, Johnson, Morris, Gricey ( now there's personality ) Carter, Janson etc, all of whom could & did beat him on their day. Ask about frustration? Talk to Gricey. My now 70 yo Father, who used to be a keen Race watcher, has completely gone off Motor Racing because of what he calls the:" Lowndes & Skaife/ Skaife & Bright Show". In other words, it's getting boring having one team win all the time. Holden OR Ford.

[Moffat Fan]

What’s the difference between Mark Skaife and a Catfish?

One’s a slimy, scum-sucking scavenger, and the other is Just a FISH!

[Aussiecollector]

Hey Moffat Fan,

At least Skaife has not ripped off his Fans with a cheap repainted model, sold at 3 times its real value.

Glenn

[Oh Five]

Looks like this forum is heading down the same gutter as the crappy "conrod" forums i used to look at once.Can we keep out the personal barrage against drivers ?, its getting pretty boring.:mad:

[the_goldie]

Just thought I would add to this...

Since 1988 when Mark Skaife made his debut in the ATCC he has featured in the top 10 every year except for 1988, 1990 and 1997. So he must be doing something right regardless of his personality... "love him or hate him" everybody is different and that is what makes the world go around...

1989 - 9th
1991 - 2nd
1992 - 1st
1993 - 6th
1994 - 1st
1995 - 6th
1996 - 9th
1998 - 3rd
1999 - =3rd with Glenn Seton
2000 - 1st
2001 - 1st
2002 - 1st

I am sure there are not too many other drivers that have this sort of record?

[toecutter]

We have all bagged Skaife and now for a bit of FUN, we can get off topic and bag the Irish. Cut and Paste. Have a LAUGH!!

Two Irishmen walk into a pet shop. Right away they go to the
bird
section and Mick says to Paddy; "Dat's Dem".
The shopkeeper comes over and asks if he can help.
"Yeah, we'll take four of dem dere budgies in dat cage op dere",
says
Mick.
"Put dem in a pepper bag".
The shopkeeper does as asked and the two pay for the birds and
leave.
They get into Mick's van and drive until they reach a cliff with
a 500ft

drop.
"Dis looks loike a grand place", says Mick.
He then takes the two birds out of the bag, places them on his
shoulders
and jumps off the cliff. Paddy watches as his mate drops off the
edge
and
goes straight down for a few seconds followed by 'Splat'.
As Paddy looks over the edge of the cliff he shakes his head and
says,
"Fock Dat, dis budgie jumpin' is too fockin dangerous for me..."


Part Two

A few minutes later, Seamus approaches. He too has been to the
pet shop
and
is carrying the familiar'pepper bag'. He then pulls a parrot out
of the
bag
and Paddy notices that in the other hand Seamus is carrying a
gun.
"Watch this Paddy" he says, as he launches himself over the edge
of the
cliff.
Paddy watches as half way down Seamus takes the gun and blows the
head off. Seamus continues to plummet until there is another
'Splat' and

he
joins Mick at the bottom of the cliff.
Paddy shakes his head and says,
"An' oim never troyin' that parrotshooting oider..."

Part Three

After a few minutes, Sean strolls up. He too has been to the pet
shop
and
walks up with his 'pepper bag'. Instead of a parrot he pulls a
chicken
out
of the bag and launches himself off the cliff with the usual
result.
Once more Paddy shakes his head -
"Fock me, Sean. First der was Mick wit his budgie jumpin, den
Seamus
parrotshooting -- and now you fockin' hen gliding....."

[ET351]

Funny :D

But don't those Irish blokes sound like Kiwis:confused:

Cheers, ET351

[SWRT]

No wonder crowds boo Skaife during the VB V8 challenge,they'd rather cheer for Bright but the only Skaife fans cheering for him in the VB V8 challenge would be VB filled drunks.

[inter]

DO YOU GUYS REMEMBER THIS?
INTER

[Gan88]

Originally posted by oldxr
don't forget the SEGA sponsored car he drove before joining hrt, where did that end up at Bathurst and the championship.

Good point.

Without the big budget backing of Winfield and now Mobil/Holden, he wasn't particularly competitive.

He has talent, but so do many of the current crop.

[Grubby]

The fans still voted for Skaife. Making him the most popular driver.

[BATHURSTFAN]

NO, The HRT/Holden/Skaife Fans voted for Skaife making him the most popular GM-Holden driver.

HRT or Holden would win most phone-in voting polls due to the fact there are lots more Holden fans out there than Ford fans.

I would like to know the ratio of Holden fans Vs Ford fans.

[Ford Boy]

I reckon part of it is that "Holden" is currently a craze, like mobile phones etc. Not that its a bad thing, well done to Holden for having got themselves into that position! But I know in Bendigo for example, there is HEAPS, and I mean HEAPS of people who think Holdens are the bee's knee's of everything. They couldnt tell a VY from a VB can, but hey, its got the Lion on it, so it must be able to beat anything with the blue oval. Once again, Im not bagging the Holden product, as it has proven itself to be very good, and very popular, and congrats again to Holden for having got themselves where they are today.... But thats why there are so many more Holden fans than there are Ford.. because Holden is currently a "craze/fashion whatever you want to call it." Im not saying ALL Holden fans are part of the craze.... Just some.... I know theres the Born and Bred die hard fans, and as much as i pity their choice ( JOKING).... its a craze...

[Leigh]

Originally posted by Grubby
The fans still voted for Skaife. Making him the most popular driver.
I'd say the obsessive-compulsives voted in Skaife...One person on ten-tenths lays claim to 5000 of the 81000 votes...all for one M. Skaife and HRT...

Cheers

[Dazz]

That could have been an exaggeration to some extent I think!

[Gan88]

Some people must be still undergoing withdrawal symptoms from not being able to vote for Australian Idol...

[Ando]

Ford Boy , i get your point but its not so much a craze than a culture , my first car was a FJ Holden which i still have and is my pride and joy, i am 43 years old so it is truly part of the family and the other car is a VY SV8 which is awesome, i am also a one eyed HRT\SKAIFE supporter( and that is fair dinkum because i do only have one eye) so i suppose that me makes me a diehard as you put it . cheers. ANDO.

[Oh Five]

Bathurstfan, not all Holden fans vote for Skaife, my votes were HRT and Murphy;)